Happy Birthday To Me

In the last few minutes of my birthday, I just wanted to say a quick thank you to Alex, Devin, Gavin and everyone else who took the time to stop and think about me on this, my 42nd birthday.

I know that 42 is old to some and young to others, for me it just feels strange.

I have known my husband more than half my life, and I love him more now than the day I married him.  I am the mother to twin adult children.  I am blessed to have my grandmother, mother, aunts, in-laws, uncle, cousins and quite a few really great friends.  I have a career I like which pays the bills, volunteer work that makes me feel good, and I hope contributes to the health and well-being of my community.

Thanks to the few of you who read these random ramblings, I appreciate your feedback and support.  Here's to making 42 a great year filled with love, laughter and enough luck to make it all that much more interesting.

A funny thing happened on the way to the dinner.......

For those of you who know me, this is going to make you laugh--a lot.

Last Friday night Alex, Devin, Gavin and I were getting ready for the Kainos Annual Dinner.  It's about 175 people in the room, all members of the "choir" if you will.  This is staff, donors, volunteers and supporters of a fabulous organization which provides vocational training and support as well as group living situations for developmentally disabled adults.  We volunteer there, and on Friday I was tasked with presenting a new fundraising campaign to this room of folks-many of whom I know well and all of whom are already supporters of Kainos.

I had been trying to put together what I was going to say for a couple of days, and had been unable to come up with something I liked.  Alex tried to help--he is amazing with coming up with catchy phrases and apt things to say to folks, but I just wasn't really feeling any of it.  I made notes.  Then I wrote out a whole speech.  None of it was quite right.

So then it was Friday evening, I came running in the door after work, started getting dressed, and Alex and I were going over all of the things I COULD say.  This is the part where it gets funny.

I was nervous.  I'm never nervous speaking in public--it may be one of my more irritating qualities.  I am often nervous when I have to do one on one conversations, especially if they are uncomfortable.  I can't remember the last time I was so nervous I couldn't put a sentence together, though, until last Friday night.

I had some notes, I knew what I needed to say, but I just didn't know what I was going to say until the moment I got to the podium.

Alex was (understandably) worried.  The boys thought it was sort of funny.

I did it though.  Got up there and spoke--supposedly pretty well.  I cracked a joke (a little bit I threw Alex under the bus, because when we left the house Alex said "Just don't make me look dumb, okay?") it drew a pretty good laugh.

I came up with two sayings today that seem to apply:

"You must do the thing you think you cannot do."  Eleanor Roosevelt
"Those who say it can't be done should get out of the way of those doing it."  Chinese proverb

Neither fits perfectly, but they do go along with my theory in life--the answer most often lies in forward motion, even when you've got the direction wrong.

Good night all--I hope your week goes well.

Do what you can, don't focus on what you can't do.

Japan.

Last week if I had said Japan, people would have wondered-vacation, business, new friend, new fascination.  Now the only possible response is.....WOW.

I get earthquakes and I get tsunamis.  I get that they happen, and I get the devastation that they cause.  I understand instinctively that horrible things happen all over the world everyday, disasters both natural and manmade, but this.  This is visceral.  It's horrible and shocking and it's happening.

We can donate money.  We can plan for our own disaster preparedness.  We can become CERT (Community Emergency Response Team) members.  We can pray, send strength and courage to those we know and those we don't.  We can do all those things, and we do and will.

What we can't do is let it take over our day to day lives.  We have to more forward, go to work and school, complain about kids and co-workers.  Put out a helping hand in your community, in your neighborhood, in your family.  Contribute to the big stuff--please do that.  Also remember to do the small stuff.

Not surprisingly, I am frustrated by the boys.  Not giant sized frustration, just constant small frustrations.  They don't pay attention to their grades, they don't take care of their responsibilities, they take more than than give at every turn in the house.  Outside of the house, they are great guys.  They have earned a lot of respect in out community, at their school, with their friends, with out family and with our friends.  Great kids, but they can't seem to focus on what they can do.

I don't have any huge thing tonight, just that I keep telling them that they have to focus on what they can do, take care of their responsibilities and move forward.

Advice I could maybe use a little of.  

That's it, just do what we can do and don't focus on what we can't do.

Tuesday night heaviness with a touch of hope

I am a member of the Redwood City Housing and Human Concerns Committee.  Part of the Committee's job is to administer Community Development Block Grants.  These are funds that come through the Federal government for us to administer within Redwood City because the city fits specific criteria regarding our populations demographics.

All of this is a complicated way of saying that I am part of a committee that solicits applications from agencies who provide direct services to Redwood City citizens who fall into several categories, including seniors, low-income, homeless, disabled and other under-served folks in the community.

Tonight we had our funding deliberations.  Which means that after receiving far more applications than we had available funding, we deliberated and put forward recommendations to the City Council.

All this means that over the last few weeks, I and my fellow committee members have been reviewing applications from non-profits, listening to representatives and clients from these organizations and tonight debating what they do, how many people they serve, and who best fits the parameters to receive these funds.

It was depressing as hell.  No lie, worst year in the five I have been involved with this committee.  We had approximately one-fourth of the funding that was requested.  It was tough, and some great organizations didn't receive funding, and none of them received the full amount of their request.  Truly depressing is the fact that many of the organizations have had their funding from other sources and their fundraising dip because of cut backs and the economy.

Now for the hope.  No really, it's in here.

Each of these organizations, and many like them in other communities accept donations in the form of cash, other assets and volunteer hours.  This means that we, each one of us who lives in a community have an opportunity to support those of our citizens who most need help through our donations.

If you already volunteer--at your child's school, at an organization that you have a personal connection to, through your church, wherever, that's great.  If you already donate to charities in your community, that's also great.

If you don't, or if you can do more, think about it.

A venti latte at Starbucks costs $4, more if you get syrup or other add-ons.  A donut costs about $1.  Lunch out at work costs anywhere from $3-20.

Times are tough, I don't mean to sound preachy, but the statistics are terrifying.  Unemployment is out of control, we are likely looking at several years before we have a significant financial recovery.  There are people in our communities who need help, and many of us are in the position to provide help.

You think that your few dollars won't help or make a significant dent, but they will.  Agencies can leverage your small donation and point to it as community support when they apply for larger grants or other private matching funds.  Those same agencies call out the number of volunteer hours donated per year as a part of their bottom line on services provided to their communities.

That's the touch of hope.  No matter how bad things get, no matter how desperate these agencies and these community members get, there are always people who can help.  That's us, folks, it's us--because if we don't do it, and don't encourage our friends to do it, who will?

Sorry to be preachy--I'm off the soapbox now, and getting ready to head to bed.  What did you do tonight?